(I have resurrected this page—although everything on it is now ancient—because I intend to get back to writings of this nature.)

• THE RULES OF ENRAGEMENT: ON THE BENEFITS + DANGERS OF ENGAGING WITH THE MEN WHO NEG, TROLL, AND/OR SEXUALLY HARASS YOU ONLINE

• TIME FOR EVERYONE'S FAVORITE GAME: DO I REALLY ENJOY THIS, OR DO I JUST THINK I DO WHEN I ACTUALLY ONLY LIKED IT WHILE HIGH OUT OF MY MIND?

• ALL HAIL $$$: MY HOARD AND SAVIOR

• A DAY IN MY BRAIN AT A 9-HOUR SHIFT AT MY PART-TIME, MINIMUM WAGE JOB

• FROM THE CASE FILES OF THE SELF-DEPRECATING SLEUTH: WHY I CAN’T REFER TO MYSELF AS AN “ARTIST” WITHOUT AUTOMATICALLY USING AIR QUOTES

• TO THE COLLEGE STUDENT AT A CROSSROADS, FOOLISH (AND SWEET) ENOUGH TO ASK ME FOR LIFE ADVICE

• THE SELF-FLAGELLATION OF MY ETERNAL SUGAR DADDY HUNT

• BOOHOO, INSTAGRAM DELETED MY ACCOUNT — AGAIN

• ON “INVISIBLE PROGRESS” IN THE AGE OF SOCIAL MEDIA: YOUR FOLLOWERS DON’T CARE THAT YOU FINALLY DID LAUNDRY AND DIDN’T CRY YOURSELF TO SLEEP LAST NIGHT

• FROM THE MAD (MISGUIDED, ANXIOUS, DERANGED) SCIENTIST FILES: IF YOU’RE FRAMING IT AS “AN EXPERIMENT,” IT’S PROBABLY A POOR DECISION

• IF YOU’RE DOWN, THAT MUST MEAN I’M UP: A BRIEF INVESTIGATION INTO MY HISTORY OF COMPULSIVELY SURROUNDING MYSELF WITH PEOPLE I CONSIDER INFERIOR

• “I’M JUST SO INTRIGUED BY YOU”: A REFLECTION ON BEING THE QUASI-HUMAN WHO DUDES FUCK RIGHT BEFORE THEY GET A REAL GIRLFRIEND

• DRUG ADDICTION AND THE LASTING CURSE OF IMMEDIATE GRATIFICATION

• LATE-BLOOMING GIRLS AND THE FATAL LURE OF THE MALE MODEL

• THE POST-REHAB BLUES: WHEN THE ABSENCE OF FAILURE NO LONGER FEELS LIKE SUCCESS